the difference between a book deal and a rejection letter? lipstick.

Most everyone knows about this already since I tend to broadcast every little event of my life out into the world via Facebook, Twitter (which I still haven't fully figured out the point of, by the way), or just from one of my outbursts, like the one I had today discovering the newest "author" to be published with Harper Collins:

"HARPER COLLINS IS PUBLISHING SARAH fucking PALIN'S BOOK WHILE AVON REJECTED ME?!?!?!"

The "fucking" is in lowercase since I was at work at didn't feel comfortable saying it loudly. Just consider it to come out sounding more like "fumcdging" since I also tried to muffle it and ended up sounding like Joe Pesci in Home Alone.

So, there's the news. I got my first rejection letter. Or, should I say, my first rejection email. I wasn't surprised or anything. I assumed Avon wouldn't want me since they're one of their most well-known publishers of romance fiction, but it still hurt.

I mean, would it have killed them to address the thing with "Dear Crystal" rather than "Dear Writer"? Of course, they apologized about the informality of the letter since they're so swapped with query letters.

Oh, I'm sorry, Avon. I hate that you're so busy killing authors' dreams that you can't bloody personalize a soul-crushing email.

Bastards.

Okay, they're probably not really bastards. But, I'm not sure since Avon falls under the Harper Collins umbrella, and Harper Collins is publishing Sexy Sarah's book. And I know that publishing companies take on the big names like Sarah Palin and Lauren Conrad (yes, I just grouped those two together and no, I don't think it's a far stretch... and that's not supposed to be complimentary for either person) for book deals partly because the money generated can be used to publish lesser known and new authors. I get that. I SO get that. However, I would be more likely to support it if they would publish this new author.

Or if they decided to publish someone other than Sarah Palin. Like, if they published Chelsea Handler's books, for example. Or if I became famous and they published my books... which would be fucking awesome. I choose that option.