stay golden!

Check it out... I finally fiddled with my TOT graphic and brought it up to my standards which are, admittedly, quite below par. Don't be horribly surprised to see a new graphic in the near future... though I must say that I'm totally digging weather vanes right now. Nothing like the crazy shit Aunt Meg had in Twister that I can't find a screencap of at this very moment. It doesn't really matter; if you were alive in 1996, you saw Twister and you know about all those crazy metal death traps Aunt Meg had in her front yard.

Also, on a related note, if you search for the words in "twister screencap" in Google images, you're going to see a bunch of naked asses sticking up in the air. Just, you know, fair warning.

Thought One:
I'm still not over those metal weather vane things in Aunt Meg's yard. What would possess a person to put all those sharp metal pieces outside on display in the middle of Tornado-friggin-Valley? I'm just saying. Tornadoes...wind...flying metal that's been shaped to move easily through the air... she and her Metals of Doom probably decapitated half of Wakita when that tornado went through there.

Get out while you can.

Thought Two:
What happened to Nelly Furtado? I've been listening to her lately and though I lost a lot of respect for her when she sold out with that "Get Ur Freak On" remix and that album after Folklore, I miss her music.

Plus, I've been listening to that remix of "Get Ur Freak On" a lot lately. I can't help it, okay? It's catchier than the swine flu.

Thought Three:
It's too soon for (really stupid) swine flu jokes, isn't it?

Thought Four:
Wolf-whistling is impossible. This isn't a thought; it's an absolute fact. And anyone who can wolf whistle is a jackass because wolf-whistling is subjective and offensive and I spent more time than I'm willing to admit trying to wolf whistle using the tutorial found in October's Cosmo and all I managed to do was make my lips chapped.

Thought Five:
I realized last night that I watch almost two hours of The Golden Girls a day. It's not even intentional. I've started watching/listening to the 7 am airing while I'm getting ready for work, then tend to watch again at 10:30pm, I'm in bed by 11 during the week (because I'm turning into an old spinstress, what with The Golden Girls and having a cat and all), tend to watch at 11pm, then set my sleep timer on the TV for 30-60 minutes after that. So, that's at least 90 minutes of watching Blanche, Dorothy, Rose, and Sophia and all their crazy antics and witty banter.

I fully blame Hallmark for constantly showing reruns and having all day long Sunday marathons of The Golden Girls. But I will say, here and now, that lying in bed watching The Golden Girls marathon on a Sunday afternoon is the best way to cure a hangover caused from a Saturday night of boozing it up.

Now, if you'll excuse me. It's almost 10:30 and I need to watch a TV show I've already seen a million times.

Rose: I just had a thought.
Sophia, Dororthy, and Blanche: Congratulations.
- The Golden Girls

thoughts on thursday

NOTE: Okay, I started this yesterday, got hit with my undiagnosed ADD and never finished this post. Since I'm too lazy/uncreative to think of something else to blog about, I'm posting what I wrote yesterday. Don't like it? Tough noogies.

It's Thursday and I have nothing real to report about anything. I guess the only way to make a real entry is to do another Thoughts on Thursday.

This would look better if I was on a computer that had more than a Paint program; just pretend it looks nicer.

Thought 1:
The other library, the one I don't work in, but the one that is still connected to the building that I do work in, is closing tomorrow at 1 because of electrical issues. How lame is that? If they get to go home at 1 on a Friday, then I should be able to as well. I mean, we're all working similar jobs, we're all on the same payroll...

Actually, that's not true. Since I'm 'full-time temporary, part-time hourly', I'm on a different payroll than the real faculty and staff. But still, those are just details that shouldn't affect me getting to go home early on a Friday afternoon.

Friday afternoon, people. That's, like, the best time to get off work and still be paid for it ever.

Thought 2:
I bet UK is glad they got rid of this guy before he went and pulled this stunt and had this lovely picture of himself taken:

Check out that handsome mug.

Thought 3:
I'm 89% sure that I'm getting a wrist tattoo. What am I getting? Why, a dorky literary tattoo of course!
The quote is from Mansfield Park by Jane Austen, and I think it will look lovely on my right wrist. I have some fears of getting inked in such a visible spot, but I'm pretty confident that it can be covered up with the bracelets I wear, or a watch, or, you know, long sleeves. Problem solved.

Plus, I really like the quote and I can't see it working as well in any other spot.

Thought 4:
My little cousins are trying out for America's Next Top Model tomorrow in Chicago. I am so excited and nervous for them. They're both gorgeous, smart great girls and they totally deserve an opportunity to shine. So, tomorrow, if you're hungover and lying on the couch watching reruns of ANTM on Oxygen, send some good thoughts their way.

Yes, that is exactly how I plan to spend my Saturday afternoon.

Thought 5:
Gah, this has been a shitty post. Maybe I can save it by throwing in a few movie lines?

Carol: Ray isn't coming out of his room until he resembles the man I married.
Art: Carol, we don't have that kind of time.
- The 'Burbs

Mr Shickadance: Ventura.
Ace: Yes, Satan? ... Oh, I'm sorry sir. You sounded like someone else.
- Ace Ventura, Pet Detective

Cassandra: There's only one reason Christian girls come down to the Planned Parenthood.
Roland: She's planting a pipe bomb?!
Cassandra: Okay, two reasons.
- Saved!

thoughts on tuesday

The main program we use at work is down this week for maintenance and I have a lot time to think when, really, I should be learning how to spell the word 'maintenance' without the use of a spellchecker.

And, taking a note from Shannon, I'm going to make some snazzy alliterative theme for this entry. Like her 'Things I Love Thursday' or 'Not Me Monday', this is going to be 'Thoughts On Tuesday'.

***Let's pretend that there's a really nice graphic right here to go along with this blog entry. When I get home today, I'll make one, I promise. ***

Thought Numero Uno:
Why has no one given Gary Busey his own reality show yet? Who would not watch that shit go down? Ratings will be astronomical if someone just followed Gary Busey around 24/7. Better yet, just give him his own station. GBTV: All Gary, All Crazy, All the Time. When he's sleeping or something, they can show movies like Rookie of the Year and Lethal Weapon. Scoff all you want, but you know that you love Rookie of the Year.

Henry: Pitcher's got a big butt, pitcher's got a big butt!
Rookie of the Year

Now, be honest, don't you want to turn your TV on in the middle of the night to see that face screaming back at you?

Thought Numero Dos:
I saw a hawk on campus this morning. At least, I think it was a hawk. I'm not exactly an expert woodsman or bird picker-outer or anything, but I'm pretty sure it was a hawk, and the Google image search I just done mostly confirms that. This thing was a fucking beast. It was walking around on the ground and I guarantee that thing came up past my knee. Being so large, you would think that the hawk wouldn't have been scared off by three black birds, which brings me to my thought... why are there so many black birds on this campus? It's like living in an omen. Seriously, it's made me totally paranoid that something bad is going to happen any minute. Like a bird pooing on me or something.

Thought Numero Tres:
Why am I counting these thoughts off in Espanol?

Thought Numero Cuatro:
Why does a cabin that has a heart-shaped jacuzzi one of the few that can be rented by people under the age of 25, but the other cabins without heart-shaped jacuzzis require you to be at least 25? Not that I object; I'm actually excited about staying at a place that has a heart-shaped jacuzzi just because I didn't think those kinds of things actually existed in the real world. Plus, it makes me laugh. A lot. I mean, look at it!


Thought Numero Cinco:
Oh my God, I really did post a picture of Gary Busey and a picture of a heart- shaped jacuzzi in the same entry. This cannot mean good things.